Depressed--take the long view
Depressed--take the long view
by Victory Crayne
Never let another person judge you and let yourself get depressed from that. They don't know who you are and what your struggle in life is.
I suggest you make a list (and refer to it whenever you get depressed) of all the great things you've done in life. List your different careers, the many different jobs you've had, maybe your marriage and kids. List your writing steps (short stories, novels). List any leadership roles you have done, including those at volunteer organizations. The longer you've lived, the longer your list will be.
Now, whenever you feel a little depressed, haul out that list of your personal accomplishments and read it.
By taking the long view, you can more easily see what progress you've made. Depression usually comes when you pay too much attention to the opinions of one person or a small group who suffer "group-think." They may compare you to their "ideal", find you coming up short, and complain you're a failure. That's nonsense. That's an error on their part.The only person you should compare yourself to is your past self. And you'll always come up a winner.
You are great.
You are intelligent and resourceful.
You are valid and have every right to be here. You add to the sum total of human experience.
If some individuals cannot see all that in you, then let them go. Surround yourself with people who affirm you, who believe in you. There are a LOT of them once you start looking. Sometimes that is hard to see when you are surrounded by average people with closed minds.
"You tend to become like the people--and ideas--you hang around with." - Victory Crayne
If you want a better life, surround yourself with better people and/or better ideas.
At several times in my life, I've done that and it opened my eyes to the fact that I was embedded in average people with lots of prejudices and "group-think." I called them my family. That was a Big mistake. We all have a tendency to love our families. Even when they are toxic to us.
Surround yourself with people who affirm you. Who believe in you. There are lots of them. You may have to hunt for them in the overwhelming mass of group-thinkers around all of us. But the search will set you free.
Being abnormal is not wrong. Quite the opposite. Being abnormal enriches humanity. I suspect that the first person to create fire was put to death immediately because he dared to take that which "belonged" to the gods. All the progress that mankind has made since those early days has come from people who dared to think outside the box.
The group-thought is that staying in the box is right. Sorry. That's why progress is so slow. If you follow the "norm" you are probably wrong.
Years ago, science fiction was unusual. Now it is so common that almost every genre has elements of science fiction. You are on the right track if you write SF. As you gaze ahead to the future, you are much better than those who are stuck in the past.
Look around you. Most of the people in the grocery stores and retail establishments are followers.
You are right to stand out.
Actually, you have every right to be here. The naysayers are the ones who are wrong.
If you ever find yourself getting depressed, it is most likely because the naysayers have ganged up on you and tried to pull you down to their level.
Take the long view instead. There is progress in your life. The day to day changes are hard to see sometimes. But every time you reach out beyond the expectations of the group-thinkers, you are reaching into the good stuff. Keep it up. As the saying goes, don't let the bastards wear you down. The mock Latin is illegitimi non carborundum.
Take the long view. You are really cool.
Victory Crayne 12-13-14
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